Luscious sex health benefits for women in midlife
A healthy diet of delicious sex — it's what a woman needs for her total well-being in midlife.
Here are all the beautiful reasons why having an active sex life in your middle years leads to your most vibrant and radiant self.
Whether you're partnered or enjoying solo play, these benefits apply to all.
Let's get it on, shall we?
Fabulous health benefits of sex for women over 40
Sex lowers stress and promotes relaxation
In our modern, hyper-paced lives, sex is your chill pill.
Chronic stress is the root cause of so many physical, mental, and emotional imbalances.
This makes stress management the ultimate preventative care for your well-being.
During arousal and orgasm, your brain releases the "feel-good" hormone dopamine and the "love drug" oxytocin. These hormones induce positive and relaxing feelings and offset the "stress hormone" cortisol.
During intimate moments with a caring partner, oxytocin helps you bond, creating feelings of security, calm, and comfort.
For solo players, the added perk of knowing exactly how to make yourself come on demand (over and over and over) leads to double and triple pleasure and relaxation!
Sex helps you sleep better
For a good night's sleep, sex is a natural and healthy option over alcohol or sleep meds.
Along with the feel-good and lovey-dovey chemicals, sex also releases prolactin, a key hormone linked to drowsiness and sleep.
In one study, participants who had partnered sex before bed reported 63% better sleep quality without orgasm and 71% after orgasm. Solo pleasure seekers reported 48% improved sleep quality without orgasm and 54.1% after orgasm.
My guess on why couples experience higher sleep quality rates than individuals is the extra oxytocin-enhanced intimacy that comes from having a partner cuddled next to you.
Sexercise is exercise
"Some folks at midlife and beyond move less, becoming more sedentary and less flexible. Sex gets you back in your body and gives you opportunities to move — with delicious endorphins making it feel good to do so!" says sexologist Carol Queen, PhD.
Getting frisky may not replace a real workout in most cases unless you're really going at it for a long time, grinding and thrusting in the throes of heat (I approve, wild woman!)
Regardless, sex is physical activity, and that's exercise.
Plus, the repetitive motions during the deed tone your muscles.
And that rush during your romp that raises your heart rate? That's legit cardio.
“Assuming an average of five to 15 minutes for sex, you get about the same amount of activity as walking a mile in 20 minutes.
If your partner is on top, they reach a heart rate of around 120. The partner on the bottom reaches about 110.
In other words, you get a minimum of cardiovascular exercise from sex.”
— Cleveland Clinic
Sex supports heart health
Heart disease is the #1 killer for women in the US, with high blood pressure (hypertension) as a major risk factor.
"Sexual activity lowers blood pressure, improves heart health, and reduces the risk of heart disease and stroke," says sexologist Rhiannon John.
She cites a 2016 study of 2,204 older adults that found high-quality sex improved women's cardiovascular health, with reduced risk of hypertension.
Speaking of "high-quality sex," here's a doozy:
A study found that postmenopausal women dissatisfied with their sex lives were significantly associated with peripheral arterial disease, which could lead to strokes.
Having bad sex is bad enough, but who knew it could kill you? 😵
Sex boosts your immune system
Immunoglobulin A (IgA) is an antibody in the immune system that acts as the body's first line of defense against infection and illness.
A study found that participants who had frequent sex (one to two times per week) showed much higher levels of IgA than those who had less sex.
No one knows exactly why sex boosts immunity.
One thought is that increased blood flow helps circulate the antibodies throughout your system.
Plus, the other benefits of sexy time — lower stress, better sleep, exercise, and feeling good — all contribute to supporting a healthy, strong body
Sex reduces aches and pains
From headaches to achy joints and all kinds of niggling pains, try popping a couple of orgasms instead of pills.
Sex releases a cocktail of feel-good hormones, including endorphins, the body's natural painkiller.
“Endorphin comes from the words ‘endogenous,’ which means within the body, and ‘morphine,’ an opiate pain reliever. Put together, that means endorphins are natural pain relievers. Endorphins can be boosted by exercising, eating, having sex, getting a massage and many other ways.” – Cleveland Clinic
"Research indicates that 60% of people with migraines reported symptom relief with sexual activity, while 37% of those with cluster headaches experienced some benefit," explains John.
Another study found that vaginal stimulation raised women's pain tolerance by 40%. After orgasm, the numbers shot up to 75%!
Sex strengthens the pelvic floor muscles
Imagine you're peeing. Now tighten the muscles down there like you would to stop the flow.
Those are your pelvic floor muscles.
These muscles hold your pelvic organs in place and support the functions of your bladder (peeing), bowels (pooping), and vagina (sex, giving birth).
As we get older, our pelvic muscles can weaken, resulting in the frequent urge to pee, incontinence, or pelvic organ prolapse (pelvic organs protruding into your vagina) — how lovely!
Toning these muscles helps control these functions, and Kegel exercises (pelvic floor exercises) help you do that.
Heightened arousal increases tension and blood flow to your pelvic region. Penetration (fingers, penis, toys, etc.) further tones the muscles. And during orgasm, the muscles pulsate, tightening and relaxing as if you're doing Kegels!
And here's a bonus:
A strong pelvic floor makes sex even more pleasurable with heightened sensations and stronger orgasms – YESSSS PLEASE. 🔥
Sex alleviates menopause symptoms
"Sexual activity can reduce hot flashes," says John.
"A 2007 study found that women with menopause symptoms had less severe hot flashes when they had sex at least once a week compared to those who didn’t."
As your hormones dip with age, your sex drive and vaginal tissues can get thin and dry.
This could make you want to skip sex altogether for lack of desire and the discomfort it brings.
But here's the paradox: regular sex can actually help with these symptoms.
Your libido and all your sexy bits aren't different from the rest of your body and its habits — they atrophy with non-use.
The more pleasurable sex you have, the more habit-forming it becomes. And the more you flex your "sex muscles," the stronger and more resilient they get.
Regular sex keeps your lady bits healthy, toned and supple with a constant flush of nourishing blood flow.
"Continuing sex and making room for sexual pleasure helps you ride out the menopause transition and keep your sex life rolling at a time when, for some women, sexual energy is depleted. This helps you have a more pleasurable life during these changes," wisely adds Queen.
Sex keeps your brain sharp
Having regular sex (meaning consistent, not boring/mechanical sex!) boosts brain cell growth, improving your memory and cognitive function.
In a memory test of 7,000 older adults aged 50-89, those who had frequent sex showed higher recall than the infrequent shaggers.
"The increased blood flow and oxygenation to the brain during sex, coupled with the release of hormones that promote brain health, contribute to these cognitive benefits." explains certified sex therapist Aliyah Moore, PhD.
"An active sex life can be a key factor in preserving mental acuity and overall brain health.
“This is particularly relevant for women in their 40s, 50s and beyond, as they may be concerned about maintaining mental sharpness and warding off cognitive decline.”
Sex eases anxiety and depression symptoms
There is a lot of research (and hopefully from your own 🔥 experiences!) linking intimacy and sexual activity to uplifting your mood and quelling the blues.
One study during the 2020 pandemic lockdown found that anxiety and depression scores were significantly lower in sexually active subjects.
Moore explains: "During and after sex, hormonal changes such as higher dopamine and oxytocin levels aid in reducing anxiety and depression symptoms.
"Regular sexual engagement might provide an emotional lift to women in their midlife, who often endure big life changes such as menopause, empty nest syndrome, and marital or professional upheavals.”
Sex enhances self-esteem and body image
"One of the most surprising and bold benefits of sex in midlife is its impact on self-esteem and body image," says Moore.
"As women age, they often face societal pressures and insecurities about their changing bodies.
“Yet, a fulfilling sex life can counteract these negative perceptions by fostering a positive body image and boosting self-confidence.
"Feeling desired and experiencing sexual pleasure can reinforce a woman's sense of attractiveness and worth, which is essential for maintaining a positive self-image.
“This newfound confidence can permeate other areas of life, leading to greater satisfaction and fulfillment in both personal and professional endeavors.”
Sex is beautifying
Sex is the ultimate fountain of youth, so help yourself to a nice, tall, sexy drink!
It’s excellent skincare. The rush of exquisite feelings and fresh blood supply nourishes every inch of your being.
Sex keeps you glowing, youthful, vibrant, and radiating with a halo of positive energy.
Sexual pleasure and orgasms rejuvenate your skin, relax facial tension, light up your eyes, and give you a lit-from-within glow.
An orgasm (or two ... or three ... or more) a day keeps the doctor away
"At some point in your 50s (more or less), the menopause transition will happen ... and you will be able to enjoy sex for its own sake, not because of (or despite) the possibility of pregnancy. Some women find a new lease on pleasure because of this!" says Queen.
Sex is a physical, mental, emotional, chemical, energetic and spiritual forcefield that promotes vibrant health and well-being as you enter middle age.
So, never stop sexing it up, and sex it up as often as you can.
Here’s to more health, more energy, more joy, more confidence, more creativity, and more pleasure that oozes from every pore to glow up the rest of your life.
Sexual energy is life-giving, life-affirming, and life-sustaining.
We need it more than ever for a radiant midlife and beyond!
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Carol Queen, PhD, is a staff sexologist at the women-founded sex toy company Good Vibes and lead author of “The Sex & Pleasure Book: Good Vibrations Guide to Great Sex for Everyone.”
Rhiannon John is a certified sexologist at Bedbible with a Master’s in Sexology, specializing in women's sexual health and pleasure.
Aliyah Moore is a certified sex therapist and resident sex expert at SexualAlpha with a PhD in Gender and Sexuality Studies.
